Why? Or really, why not?

Yesterday, Jack and I are riding to school. He's listening to an oldie but goodie "Peep's Animal Homes" story on CD. I had stumbled upon it in the car and popped it in to surprise him. He lost his love for Peep and the Big Wide World (from TLC and Discovery Kids) a year or two ago. But the old favs still warm his heart at times. And this is one of those times. Anyway, so we're riding along and he says, from the back seat, "Mommy, why does Quack wear the same hat all the time?" and I take pause. It feels so normal. It flowed so easily. We banter back and forth with ease. I say, "I guess it is because it is the only hat he has. Isn't it funny that a duck wears a hat?" "Yeah", he laughs, and then says "Why doesn't he have any other hats?" I say that I don't know. We giggle at the silliness of a duck wearing a hat and go back to the story.

But here's the thing. Sometimes you know that something normal is special because, when you experience it, you realize that you never experience that normal thing. It was so noticeable that Jack asked me a "why" question because he never does. Not never but not often. Maybe once every two weeks or so. And I just wonder why. Why does he do it in this moment with such ease and yet not inquire in such a (simple) way on a regular basis? I am baffled. Surely it is in there, or he wouldn't be able to spit it out in times like this. Why doesn't he ask more "why questions", I ask myself. Hopefully, as he continues to grow and heal he will continue to develop this skill. Why not, right?

Jack's Dentist Visit is a Success!!! Way to go, Jack!

Today was Jack's official first dental appointment. Yes, he's 6 (and a half, he'll remind you) but this has been one of those forbidden tasks. We tried when he was 4 with our family dentist but it was a complete disaster, full of screaming, big eyes and clamped down jaw. A failure, to say the least. But we knew we couldn't avoid it forever, so we made an appointment with Dr. Tim McNutt, Pediatric and Special Needs Dentist. Mommy was very apprehensive as she broke the news to Jack in the car on Monday about his upcoming appointment. To my amazement, Jack said "Ok, but they can just count my teeth, ok? If they hurt my teeth, they will fall out and I will throw up." Alrighty then! So we planned a bit of a "look see", and prepared the staff accordingly. If we got through teeth counting, perhaps brushing, we'd call it a success and schedule a follow up. We considered sedation, but decided to just try it first to see where we stood with him and his dentist phobia.

All week he's reminded us that on Thursday he'd be going to school AFTER he met the dentist. Mommy and Grandpa drove Jack to the dentist and he seemed comfortable with the idea. He checked out the fish tank in the waiting room and talked calmly about other things. He was quickly called back and I went with him. I was expecting some panic, but he sat nicely in the chair (we never even got that far at 4!) and Miss Donna brought him a big stuffed alligator, complete with a set of human-like teeth, a giant alligator toothbrush and giant alligator mirror. Jack thought this was great! He showed Miss Donna how to brush and they counted the teeth. The rest of the appointment went just as smoothly! They eased him into the instruments, letting him hold them, use them on "Alli", and get comfortable before using them on his mouth. He was able to watch the Disney Channel above the chair, and the distraction was effective.





Dr. McNutt offered lots of praise to Jack from the sidelines. Miss Donna counted his teeth (20), checked for 6 yr molars (none), checked for loose teeth (none of those either), brushed and used a scaler. Then Dr. McNutt came over, "checked" Miss Donna's work, and used the scaler to further clean Jack's teeth til he had a beautiful pearly white smile!! The entire appointment was 30 minutes long, and Jack never got upset or anxious. They took a picture of Jack with Dr. McNutt and printed it so he could take it and show his class at school. He got to pick a few prizes from the treasure chest for his good behavior and Dr. McNutt told him to come back when he's 7 and to bring his little brother too. Jack said "ok!"

As we walked to the car, all 3 of us proudly grinning from ear to ear, Jack said "I wasn't scared at all!" No, he wasn't scared. He kept his emotions in check and found a way to rationalize what previously had been some irrational feelings about this experience. I am overcome with pride over such a seemingly average experience. But that's all we want...is to just allow him to be like everyone else. And he sure did that today! Yay, Jack!

Time for Birthdays

September comes in the Halbert house with many birthdays to celebrate. Uncle David on the 23rd, Daddy and Uncle Mike on the 24th and Meemaw on the 28th. We had a celebration dinner for Daddy (just the 4 of us) after work. Mommy made a special dinner for Daddy and Jack helped wrap the presents. We officially had 1 gift for Daddy and Jack was unhappy with that. He insisted that we give Daddy more presents, so he gave Daddy one of his recent drawings and we threw together a few other trinkets for Jack to wrap. He really enjoyed preparing for the "party."




The gift was a black and white portrait of Jack for Daddy's office. We also gave him an IOU for a picture of Tyler. Here's Jack's picture. He looks so grown up now!


Then a few days later Meemaw came to visit and we celebrated her birthday too. Jack made a card to be given to her from "the boys" and wrote her name: Mimal He is very into phonetic spelling these days and insisted that this is the right way to spell Meemaw. We weren't about to correct him. It was so cute!

Jack is becoming very well connected with the calendar. He now has every student in his class along with his teacher and student teacher's birthdays memorized. Funny, since his birthday is still half a year away! He also enjoys talking about what his age will be when he is in "x" grade in school. He's so quick to figure out that type of math in his head!

On the evening of Daddy's birthday party, Daddy gave Jack a very special gift. It was a watch. It is the very watch that Daddy wore when he was a boy. Jack understood the concept and was so excited to have his own watch. He proudly wore it all evening and had me take pictures of it. The next day he wore it to school where the 35 year old watch band promptly broke. So it's back to the watch shop (where it spent all summer being restored!) Hopefully Jack will be back to telling time with it again soon. He really loves it!

Inside Out

Jack says funny things. A lot. We find ourselves laughing quite often at his interesting perspective or truthful and curly way of putting things. The other nite I was walking by his room and heard him talking. Not quoting some TV show or movie, but talking about his day. So, I stuck my head in and here's how it went:

K: Hey there. What are you talking about?
J: I'm telling my kids in my heart with Jesus about my day.
K: Oh! How many kids do you have living in your heart with Jesus?
J: 52, um I mean, 39, no 11.
K: 11? Wow. Do they have names?
J: NOOOO, Mommy. They are just kids!

Jesus is now a sidekick of Jack's. He is brought up from time to time at the dinner table, such as:

J: Can I be excused?
K: Can you eat a little more chicken first please?
J: No, Jesus is full.

Or:
K: Are you all done?
J: No, Jesus just wants a little more to eat.

Funny, funny boy.

Home Away from Home

This past year Jack has had the amazing blessing of being able to spend lots of time with his maternal grandparents. They live 8 miles away in their 'retirement' home in a cute, young neighborhood with lots of families. Along with the wonderful time he has had sleeping over, playing in their well stocked playroom and all in all being the apple of their eyes, he has also spent time playing with the neighbor boys. Ethan is 4 and has a trampoline, Lane is 9 and loves baseball and Brody is 3 and is a great buddy for Jack. Before school started, Mimi and Grandpa had Jack over for a 2 nite/3 day sleepover. While he was there, the boys played together until almost dark. Here's a look at that great nite. It's one of those moments when I wish we lived in a neighborhood!









This most recent extravaganza included a trip to Chuck E. Cheese's and lots of play at their house. Jack loves 'doing Wipeout' at home and had set up his course in their living room as well.






Grandpa also took Jack to a Kids' Workshop at Lowe's. Jack built a wooden locker. They both really enjoyed the workshop and Grandpa really enjoyed sharing his love for building with Jack. I love that he wore the goggles!!

Honestly, I'm not sure who gets the most out of it? Me with the much needed and enjoyed break? Tyler with some one on one time with Mom and Dad? Jack with all the love and attention Grandparents can bestow? Or Grandma and Grandpa themselves? We all are blessed...

Kindergarten Week 1 (plus some)

The first week is in the record books. And it was a great one. For a long time we've all been nervous about starting 'big kid school'. In fact, just before Jack's birthday in April, he was dead set against going. So much so that he declared that he was NOT turning 6, he was NOT having a birthday party and he was NOT getting presents....because he didn't want to go to Kindergarten.

So I was very proud when he was ready to visit the classroom on the "Sneak Peak" day the week prior and equally proud when he actually walked in to the classroom on Monday for his first day, a half day, in Mrs. Ward's class. He was nervous, and he didn't really care to have his picture taken, but he wore his 'uniform' (standard school attire), allowed me to tuck his shirt in, wore his backpack without complaint, and said hello to Mrs. Ward when we got there. He helped me sort all our required school supplies in bins by reading the categories above them and a couple of parents were amazed that he could read so well. Sometimes I forget that many Kindergarteners aren't reading yet!

Tuesday nite, with the first full day of school looming the next day, he cried at bedtime saying that he didn't like the 'big kindergarten day' (the full day). He said that he just liked the 'little' day. I assured him that he would like the full day once he got there, just like he had ended up liking the half day, once he tried it. Sure enough, he enjoyed himself on Wednesday. I know that it is a lot of work for him to keep himself quiet and attentive for 7 hours, and I'm not sure how well he's actually doing that, but he is telling us a lot about his day, so I know he's paying attention! He knows 13 of the 19 kids' names in the class. And he's happy to go each day. No separation issues...I think Tyler is having a harder time with it than Jack is! Tyler is sooooo excited to see his brother each day at pick up. He giggles and squeals when Jack gets in the car. It is adorable. And Jack must first talk to Tyler before he'll give me the time of day. He says "I want to talk to my brother first!" I love watching the two of them together. It's too bad they only have about 4.5 hours each day to enjoy each other's company.

Just when we thought that Kindergarten might be a piece of cake (I'm exaggerating now, for sure!) day 7 hit and we found out that Jack was the first child in the class to grace the Time Out chair. I must say I am shocked. He's never been in time out at preschool in the 3 years he has attended and rarely does he get in trouble at home. He was accused of kicking another student and, quite frankly, he didn't explain himself or try to get out of it. I think it was more of a tap (it happened during circle time when they were seated on the carpet and he doesn't even know who he kicked) but rules are rules, and he certainly won't be scarred for life by it. I, on the other hand, might be though! In his wrong sense of things, he actually bragged a little when he realized he was first to be in Time Out. His silly little head. I guess being first usually does have its accolades. But not today. Time will tell how easy or difficult this year will be for him. But I dare say we're off to a great start, Time Out chair and all.

I hope that by the end of the year we can all have a good laugh over this incident.

First day of school. Daddy and Mommy walked Jack in to his class.

Meeting Mrs. Ward on the previous Friday during her Open Classroom time. Jack said, "I'll see you on August 11th!"

There goes our Big Boy! (sniff, sniff!)

Goodbye, Preschool...Hello, Kindergarten!

Last Day of Judson

Wow. Preschool has come to a close. What a journey it has been. I can only imagine that there will be the same growth and amazement as I look back at the end of Kindergarten. Or at least I hope.

Today I stand as a proud mom, watching a chapter close in my son's life. We are saying goodbye to his wonderful preschool and all the friendly faces there. He walks away without looking back...ready to face all that lies ahead. I'm not sure if he really knows what to expect, but he has come to a place of understanding and resolution that Kindergarten will begin in just 5 more days. And, I suppose that I have as well.

Judson was an amazing place for us all to grow. Jack entered Judson in the summer of 2005, having just turned 3, needing a lot of support, a backpack full of diapers, special snacks (some things don't change!) and lots of comfort, understanding and love. He still had so much growing to do! His first teacher there, Miss Penni, was a first year teacher and was full of compassion and drive to be an awesome teacher for Jack. She asked lots of questions and was always willing to try anything! We went through 3 aides that year until we found Miss Linda, who loved Jack with all her heart. She was the perfect support person for him at that time in his life. It made me feel so comfortable to leave him, even on days when he dug his heels in outside the classroom door, because she truly cared for him like he was her own. I got my first taste of preparing and executing an IEP meeting (s). There was so much to learn!



Four year preschool began with a big bump as Miss Linda left Metro just a few weeks into the school year. I lost my footing for a bit, worrying about Jack and how he would handle so much change. But Miss Tama filled the gap and, in the end, it was the best thing for Jack. It forced Miss Tama to step in and become Jack's primary teacher. That set a precedent that has never changed. Jack began to take direction from his teacher in all situations. He became increasingly social and independent that year. His aide changed often and he handled it with ease!

(taken THIS year with Miss Tama)

5 year preschool was his time to blossom. Miss Pam was amazing. She encouraged us to let Jack fly 'solo' for the second semester without his aide. We were all so proud when that move proved successful and Jack finished the year independent, social and so well liked. He had developed true friend relationships with a few of the boys in the class and they spent time playing together outside of school. It was hard to say goodbye this Spring to that class. The kids were all so wonderful and supportive and the class had a great synergy.



Summer session this year was 8 weeks long on Tuesdays and Thursdays from 9-2. Jack enjoyed his teacher, Miss Amanda (Miss Tama's daughter), and had a great time seeing his friends at Judson each week. He will miss terribly the gym, where many a mile was spent racing around on bikes and motorcycles as well as the playground, with the famous hill.

We're armed with a new backpack, new lunchbox, new Standard School Attire, old shoes (his choice), a tiny bit of confidence and a bit more of anxiety over what the new school and Kindergarten has in store for our little guy. He's growing up! Miss Ward called today to introduce herself and to invite Jack to tour the classroom on Friday. She was the teacher we were praying for. She seems like a great fit for Jack's personality! We look forward to a great year with her and the rest of the class.

Boston, here we come!

We made our annual pilgrimage to Boston last week. We've been a few times now and each time it has been so wonderful to see our boys and how they've progressed. My friend, Donna, has 3 boys now. The oldest is 6 and was diagnosed on the spectrum before he was 2. Her middle boy just turned 5 and her new baby was 3.5 weeks old at the time of the visit. Jack had a wonderful time, as usual, playing with the boys and interacting with them. He loved playing on the big waterslide with the oldest and playing chase around the house with the younger boy. This visit was the first time that we saw Jack and the younger boy gravitate toward each other, sometimes leaving the older boy out of the mix. It was heartbreaking for us moms to watch. Her eldest, not able to navigate the boys' interactions at times and my son, oblivious to the dynamic of exclusion. They still have a lot to learn socially. But they had moments of greatness and were so thrilled to be together. Here's a couple of great pictures of the boys together from the trip!

Jackisms

Jack is completing "My Book About Me" by Dr. Seuss. In it, the book has lots of questions and fill in the blanks that he completes. In the section about eating it says to choose either "I eat like a bird" or "I eat like a horse." I asked Jack which one was true for him and he said "But I eat like a PERSON!" True.

Jack also said that when he grows up he wants to be either a doctor or a Jungle Cruise boat captain at Walt Disney World. Oh to dream!

Books Are Great - Babies, Not So Much

Jack went to our local branch of the library on Monday with me in search of Shel Silverstein books. He loves The Giving Tree and wanted to check out the books featured on the book's jacket. So off we went on an adventure. Historically it has been difficult to get Jack interested in new books without a common theme, character or plot, but on this day he was an avid book collector. He checked out 15 books in all and as of Tuesday nite, a mere 30 hours later, he has read, all by himself, 11 of them! He also is the proud owner of his very own library card, complete with lanyard and key fob! This is NOT your Daddy's library card!



Here are the titles that were of interest to Jack this week. Perhaps I can get him to review a few of them soon.

The Missing Piece Meets The Big O
Where the Sidewalk Ends
Who Wants a Cheap Rhinoceros
A Giraffe and a Half
(all by Shel Silverstein) and...
No Haircut Today
Busytown Collection of Stories
The Baker's Dozen
When Sophie Gets Angry...Really, Really Angry
Animals Should Definitely Not Wear Clothing
I Love School
Who Needs Donuts?
Percy's Chocolate Crunch
How Much Is That Doggie In the Window?
No, David!
The Best Mistake Ever and other stories


Then, after reading Mother Cat's Busy Day (from the R. Scarry Busytown Collection) and Sophie Gets Angry, Really, Really Angry we talked about how much we missed each other while he was at a sleepover at Mimi and Grandpa's house the night before. I asked him who he missed the most and, of course, he said Tyler. Then he said "I'm so glad that I love my brother. But I really do not want a sister, PLEASE!" Here is a peek at Jack being an awesome big brother to Tyler.